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Wednesday, March 25, 2015

TIME

Time is of the essence. Time heals all wounds. Only time will tell. In due time. Time after time. Time flies by when you're having fun. Time's up!

Time is a tricky, tricky thing. The older we get the faster it seems to slip from our fingers no matter how tight our grasp. I remember when we were young, we'd count down our birthdays, wishing we were already 13, 16, 18 and finally, 21. Once we graduated college and entered the 'real world' of finding real jobs that pay real incomes so we can afford to pay our very real bills, time began to speed up. The years began to pass with a blink of an eye. I remember things like they were yesterday. Meeting my future husband, his Easter sunday proposal, my bachelorette party and bridal shower, our wedding. There was baby #1 then baby #2, a move to Virginia and within that same year our move back. All these things take time, all these things have sped up the process of time. All these things have occupied my time.

It's been over a week since my last blog, although it truly feels like a couple of days ago since I last checked in. It's not that I have a shortage of topics to write about, I just don't seem to be able to find the time!  I've never understood people who lay around bored with nothing to do. I have a list yay high and I just keep adding more things to it. I'm never bored, ever! Even in my younger years I was always running around busy, busy with no time to think.  When I tackle my to do list I feel good, I feel proud. It's like a natural high. It's when I don't have time but the errands and phone calls and that nagging list are at the forefront of my thoughts demanding the attention that I can't seem to give that I'm internally combusting from within.

I need to find the time. Make the time. Organize my time. The months are passing, laying themselves out so quickly that it's folding into years before my very eyes. When did Lily turn 5 when we brought her home from the hospital just the other day?! How am I married with 2 kids when I was just daydreaming about this perfect life, and now here it is, playing itself out.

Will I look back 5 years from now in awe and happiness and pride for all the other things that I've achieved that have changed the course of my life? Or will I look back in frustration that I still haven't done half the things I'd like because time wasn't on my side?

They say to steal time away for yourself. I think that's what I need to start doing. Sometimes maybe we need to be selfish before we can be selfless again.

It's go time!    

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